Inell's Fanfiction Archive

Willow had never realized just how lonely her dorm room truly could be until that night. After having both Buffy and Faith in the small confines, it seemed even more empty after they had both left. In a way, it was silence that Willow welcome. In another, it unnerved her. She still couldn't believe that night had really happened. Even now, it seemed like some sort of bad dream. Both slayers wanted her, cared for her, loved her. It was too unreal. Had it been anyone other than Faith and Buffy, Willow would have believed it to be some sort of elaborate joke. She knew though that Buffy would never play with her feelings like that. And, in a way, she didn't think Faith was capable of that anymore. Looking at the brunette slayer, Willow had seen the changes. All small so far, but they were changes. Willow knew that Faith really meant her words of caring...really wanted to change.

It was all so annoying in a way. According to both girls, they had been in love with her for months. She couldn't help but wonder if one of them had said something back senior year how her life would have changed. She would avoided the entire disaster with Oz. No, not disaster, she amended mentally. She had loved him, in a way. Even now, she couldn't think about him with hate. They just hadn't been meant for each other. He had never really been able to give her what she needed, though at the time she had had no idea what exactly that had been. She still didn't really know. She knew she wasn't gay. After all, she had loved Oz, had had sex with him and enjoyed it in a way. She also knew that the night with Faith had been the first time she had ever truly felt special or loved. To this day, her body reminded her of the pleasure she had felt at Buffy's hands. She would wake up with an ache in her stomach and dreams fresh in her mind.

Willow groaned as she laid back on her bed. It wasn't fair of them to do this to her. It took her forever to decide what to wear to school. How could she possibly make a decision that would affect her entire life in less than a day? Did they really think she could do that? Could she? There was no way. She had spent days thinking over the entire fiasco in depth. Each time, she had never been able to come to any solid conclusions. Now, with Buffy's honest declaration of love and Faith's words of affection, everything had changed. With just three simple words, they had thrown her entire world askew. She was so tired of thinking. With that in mind, she got off the bed and grabbed her coat. She needed to escape from this room with the constant whispers of Faith and Buffy still in her mind. She had no idea where she was going, but it was going to help take her mind off her problems.

She walked around campus aimlessly for over an hour, no destination in mind. She was keeping her eyes open for vampires, but didn't run across anything unusual for once. It seemed that even the demon world knew of her mood and wanted to avoid her. She had walked around the commons for the third time before she realized that even out in the fresh air, she couldn't keep her mind off the difficult decision she was facing. It just seemed too ironic to have to choose between Faith and Buffy. Both girls were so different, their common link being the slayer. It was like choosing between night and day. Buffy representing the safety and warmth of the day while Faith stood for the danger and uncertainty of the night. How could she choose one and forever lose the other? She didn't think she could live without them both, and there was her big problem.

She was back at her dorm room, her mind a bit more clear, after another couple of hours. It was nearly two in the morning and she suddenly felt tired. All of the past few nights of restless sleeping had finally caught up with her. She was exhausted. She started towards her bed before changing her path. She pulled Buffy's covers down, laying down and smelling the sweet scent of the blonde slayer. She smiled softly at the familiar scents and the calm they brought to her. A vision of Faith made her stomach tingle as she drifted off to sleep, a decision of sorts finally reached.