Willow Rosenberg watched as a slight breeze blew the leaves in her front yard. Her eyes watched one leaf dance across the street before disappearing from her view. She felt a bit like that leaf, alone and at someone else's control.
She leaned back against the porch railing, her thoughts on her friends. Xander was with Cordelia having the traditional 'meet the parents' dinner. Buffy, Faith, Angel and Giles had gone off at dusk to fight a new demon that had come to town. A kikirete, this demon had killed several citizens on Sunnydale in just a few short days. So, she was alone.
Not that she minded being alone. No, actually, she used to love it. The quiet, private time where she was alone with her thoughts. But, then Buffy had come to town. With Buffy had come late night talks and research parties and friends. Willow had gotten spoiled with all the loudness. Now, being alone almost frightened her. It had been happening a lot lately.
Xander had found love with Cordelia, taking him more and more away from their group. Then, Faith had come to town. After that, Buffy had started insisting that Willow remain home where she would be safe. Safe. On the Hellmouth. What a fucking joke. Willow couldn't fault her friend. She knew Buffy was trying to protect her. But, her friend failed to realize that she might not need protecting all the time.
Take that night for instance. She could have helped fight that Kikirete, but no. She had been told to stay home. Buffy had promised to call as soon as the demon was slain. Of course, knowing Faith, Buffy would be too busy to remember Willow. 'I'm not jealous' Willow told herself thoughtfully. She just hated being left out.
Willow stood and dusted the back of her pants off. She looked at the full moon and smiled fondly wondering how Oz was doing in New York. She'd have to send him an email. She missed him on nights like this. He had been a good friend. Another breeze blew in, makng her arms get goosebumps. She put her arms around herself and headed inside.
Maybe Buffy had called and left a message. It had been several hours since the four had left. She hoped that nothing had gone wrong. She looked at the machine. No blinking light. Frowning, she sat on the couch and turned the television on. Time to wait.
*******************
"Ooomph" Angel fell back on the ground, his back hitting a branch. He sat up, shaking his head to clear it.
They had found the Kikirete easily. Unfortunately, the demon had aquired several vampire helpers. They had had to stake over a dozen vamps before even getting to the demon they were after. Now, they were tired and things weren't going well. He saw the demon head towards Faith and moved quickly.
Angel reached for the demon, forgetting Giles stern warning not to make direct contact with the Kikirete. He felt a slight burning in his hands as he made contact. He lost his balance, falling backwards. The Kikirete landed on top of him. He held it down, calling for Buffy to help.
Buffy stuck the sword into the demon, watching as it exploded into a fine white powder. She looked at Angel and frowned slightly. He was in a kneeling position, holding his head.
"You ok Angel?" she asked, making sure that Giles and Faith were ok. They both were.
Angel's vision blurred as a heat ran through his body. His demon strained against its cage before backing up in fear. Something had entered him. He felt himself losing control as something else took over. His thoughts and dreams over the last few months flew past his closed eyes. One image stood out more than any other. He now had a purpose. He stood, a slight smile on his handsome face.
"I'm fine Buffy. Run along. I'll see you tomorrow" he said softly. He watched them leave, Giles giving him a curious look. The watched had not seen him grab the demon, luckily. He began to walk North, his destination like a magnet. His mind was filled with images of red hair and innocence. One goal controlled him. Make Willow his.
**********
Willow groaned as the fake spaceship flew into view. She could see the wires holding it up. If she looked closely, it looked like someone had just taped together some paper plates. She was watching the late late movie, some fifties sci-fi flick that had her laughing. When she was younger, Xander and Jesse used to come over and watch these old movies with her when her parents were away. She remembered them with fondness and a nostalgic smile.
She heard a soft knock and smiled. Buffy must have decided to come by rather than call. She was happy that her friend hadn't forgotten her like she feared. She stood, setting the remote on the table. She moved to open the door, the smile dimming a bit.
"Angel. Is something wrong? Did something happen to Buffy?" she asked, not knowing any other reason the vampire would come to see her.
Angel looked at her, the power inside him rising. He was going to have her. "Can I come in?"
"Of course. Come in" she said, her expression growing curious. He didn't act like someone had died so she was trying to figure out why he was there.
Angel walked into the room, his dark eyes watching her. He watched her close the door and walk back into the living room. He moved quietly, locking the front door. He then followed behind her, his eyes leaving no inch of the room unseen.
Willow felt uneasy, which was stupid. This was Angel. Yet, there was something about him that actually scared her. He looked at her as he sat down, his eyes searing into her. He watched her without saying a word, the gaze of a predator. She suddenly felt as if she should run. She was acting paranoid.
"Well...why are you here?" Willow asked, her fear making her less than polite.
"You're here" he said simply. He looked her over, seeing what he always saw. She was wearing an old t-shirt with the high school name coming off. A pair of sweats and socks. Her hair was pulled back with two clips, keeping it off of her face. He felt the familiar desire as he absorbed her innocence and trust. She was scared this time. She could sense the change in him. Too bad it wouldn't help her.
"O.K....." Willow said, her breath quickening. She didn't like this. She hadn't even been this frightened of Angelus. Something had happened to Angel. She couldn't tell what, but he was not himself. He was looking at her with desire. Definitely not himself. "Well, I was about to go to bed. Can you leave now?"
Angel laughed, "No, sweet. I can't."
"Angel...this isn't funny. I want you to leave now!" Willow said, standing. She knew she was probably overreacting, but she was scared. Scared of Angel.
"NO!" He roared, the power in him taking over completely. He had to have her. He grabbed her arm, squeezing tight. When she cried out in pain, he laughed. "Tonight, I make you mine Willow."
Willow saw his eyes glow a redish gold before he pushed her to the couch. His words penetrated her mind and she began to struggle. Something was inside him, but she had no idea what. What did he mean, make her his? He slapped her face hard, sending her head into the couch. She tried to scream but his hand covered her mouth.
"I've wanted this for so long...you underneath me screaming...claiming your innocence...I've dreamed about it so often. Did you ever know?" he asked, his voice soft.
She shook her head, pushing against him. She bit his hand, screaming as he pulled back in pain. "NOOOOOOO!!!!!!"
"You little bitch." he hissed, hitting her face again. He looked at the bite mark on his hand and then back at her, "You'll pay for that, my little whore."
"Let me go...please let me go...Angel! Don't do this...god, please don't do this...." she cried out, tears on her face.
He laughed as he moved her wrists into one of his large hands. He took in her wide eyes, the haggard way she was breathing, the fear that rolled off her in waves....His. "Sit back little girl. This is going to be a bumpy ride." He sneered at her, reaching down and ripping her shirt open.
Willow pushed against him trying to get free. His hand caught her breast in a rough hold, squeezing tightly. She closed her eyes, not wanting to believe this was happening. She looked around wildly, seeing nothing that could help her. She pushed again, this time catching him off guard. She broke loose, falling to the floor, her knee hitting the table, the rest of her leg hitting the top hard. She cried out in pain as the glass shattered around her leg.
She heard Angel cursing behind her. She dragged herself across the floor, her leg not much help. She felt his weight land on her, his hands roughly grabbing her hair and pulling her head up. His mouth bit into her neck, making her cry out. He pushed her head back down, her nose hitting the floor hard. She felt his hands on her waist as he flipped her over.
"That wasn't very nice" he said smoothly, anger in his eyes. "You like it rough, little girl? I can be rough."
She clawed at the carpet trying to pull herself out from underneath him. It was no use. He was too strong. He straddled her stomach, his eyes wild. Power rolled off his body in waves as he reached down and slapped her again. She heard a crack and knew distantly that it was her head hitting the floor. She felt his hands on her breasts and heard material ripping.
Angel threw the remains of her white cotton bra behind him. Her breasts were small but firm. He leaned over, taking one into his mouth. He bit hard on her nipple, making her cry out again. He smiled as he sat up, blood on his lips. He caught her flailing arms in a tight grip, taking pride in the bruises that were already forming on her pale flesh. She was his.
Willow closed her eyes, not able to watch him. This wasn't Angel. It couldn't be. But, he seemed so much like him. She turned her head as she felt him pull her sweats off. She opened her eyes, blinking away the blood that was dripping from her face. She saw the television, the movie still playing. She felt his teeth as he began to bite his way down her body. She gave up struggling. It was only making him more mad.
She kept her eyes on the sci fi movie as he entered her fully. She screamed as he filled her, breaking through her virgin barrier with roughness. His hands squeezed her flesh hard as he drove powerfully into her. He must have realized she had quit fighting because he let her arms go. His other hand came down, turning her head so she had to look at him.
"You're mine Willow. No one else touches you ever. My little fuck toy." he ran his thumb over her tears, bringing it up to his mouth. He licked it clean, his eyes never leaving hers. "Always mine."
She heard his words and began to struggle again. She felt his fist hit her side as he continued to fuck her hard. She moved her arms up, clawing at him. She saw blood on his chest where her fingers scraped him. He looked at her, his eyes growing more angry. "Stop fighting it Willow. You have no control. I do. I always do."
"NO!" she screamed, hitting his face with all her strength.
"Fucking whore!" he yelled, his face morphing. "You must like it rough, bitch. Fine. I can do that."
Her eyes widened in fear as she felt him pull out her. She glanced down and saw his cock. It was so big. She saw the blood and knew it was hers. She had to be having a nightmare. This wasn't real. She would wake up and it would all go away.
Angel pulled her up by her hair, throwing her back to the floor hard. She landed on her stomach, his eyes raking over her. He laughed as she again tried to crawl away. For awhile there he had thought she had given up. It wasn't as much fun if she didn't scream. He kneeled behind her, his hands going around her waist and pulling her to her knees. He pushed her head into the floor, the scent of her blood making him even more hard.
Willow's head went up and she screamed loud as he entered her tight ass. Tears ran down her face as he entered her fast and deep. She felt as though someone was splitting her open, so much pain. Her entire body was hurting. She saw the blood on the carpet underneath her and knew it was hers. She felt Angel's teeth as he bit into her back, his hand kneading her breast roughly. She felt his pace quicken and then she felt something cold shoot into her.
Angel pulled out, wiping the blood from her back. He pushed her to the floor, her sobbing the only sound beside the television. He went to her face, lifting her head by her hair. Her face was bruised and bloody. He delighted in the sight. Her eyes looked at him with hate and loathing. "You got me dirty. Clean me off" he ordered, pushing his cock against her torn lips. "If you bite, I'll make this seem tame."
Willow opened her mouth and took his cock inside. She tasted her blood mixed with his semen and her own juices. She closed her eyes as she allowed him to rape her mouth. It was the only part of her he hadn't had. She heard him grunt and soon cold seed spilled deep into her throat. She gagged but swallowed as much as possible. She hoped this would be over soon.
"Good whore. Remember sweets. You're mine" Angel said, getting dressed. His eyes surveyed room, taking in the shattered table and the blood that covered the carpet. The evil inside told him it was time to leave. His work here was done. Smiling a satisfied smile, he left her broken, sobbing and naked on the floor.
Angel got a few blocks from Willow's house before he fell to his knees. He began to cough, a white powder exiting his mouth. He gagged, trying to get control. Looking up, his eyes cleared slowly. Confused, he looked around.
The last thing he could remember being in the cemetary fighting that demon. He stood, the stench of sex and blood assaulting him. He looked down, trying to figure out what had happened. He again looked around the street, suddenly recognizing the neighborhood. Willow lived close to here. He suddenly felt a pain shoot through him as memories flooded his mind.
Willow crying and begging for help. Blood. Willow looking at him with hate. Fucking Willow. He shook his head, not sure if it had been a nightmare or real. He couldn't have hurt Willow. He loved her. He would never rape her....beat her. He took off running towards her house.
*******************
Giles rubbed the bridge of his nose as he tapped his pencil. "Buffy. I know the details. I was there. Just explain the part where you stabbed the Kikirete."
Buffy frowned, "Fine. But, I think breaking a nail was pretty important."
"Right up there with world peace, B" Faith said dryly.
Buffy stuck her tongue out at her fellow slayer, "Well, Angel grabbed him. They fell and Angel held him while I stabbed the thing. That was about it."
"What?" Giles said, sitting up. "Angel touched it?"
"Yeah. Why?" Buffy asked. "Oh, you said not to didn't you? Is Angel going to die or something?"
"Good lord...I wish you had told me sooner. I hope it isn't too late" Giles muttered.
"What the fuck is going on?" Faith asked, sharing a confused look with Buffy.
"The kikirete. It makes it's host, so to speak, go after the one it loves most. If it got Angel, he'll do whatever it takes to claim the one he loves."
"You don't mean kill do you?" Buffy asked. "Angel would never kill anyone..."
"He wouldn't have a choice. He would no longer be in control of his actions. And, it really depends. Rape, murder, torture... Usually, the kikirete leaves its host after the act is done and one or both participants end up dead. Murder, suicide is very popular among the hosts."
"So, Angel might be coming after me?" Buffy asked, worried.
Giles shook his head slightly, "Not you. Angel no longer loves you. He hasn't since he's come back."
Buffy hated hearing the words though she had known for awhile that she and Angel would never be the same. "Then who? What if he isn't love with anyone?"
Faith thought about it, chewing her lip. Her feet hit the floor, "Fuck...it's Red isn't it?"
"Willow? Angel doesn't love Willow...does he?" Buffy asked her watcher.
"I'm not sitting around here to discuss this. I'm checking on Red." Faith said, leaving the library.
"Giles...if he got to her....what would he do?" Buffy asked, fearful for her friend and her ex-lover.
"I don't know...I really don't know." Giles said softly, hoping that they were wrong.
**********
Angel ran into Willow's house, calling her name. He went into the living room, guilt going through him as he took in the blood and broken furniture. He heard a noise behind him and turned, his heart breaking as he saw her standing there.
Willow knew immediately that this was her Angel, not the monster who had raped her. But, he still had the same face. She backed away from him, her body taut with fear. "Why are you here?"
"I'm sorry...I'm so sorry" he said over and over, blood tears on his face.
"It wasn't you....was it?" she asked softly, her body hurting from standing.
"NO!" he said, "I'd never hurt you...never."
"I can't see you right now.....My mind knows it wasn't really you, but I'm scared." she said, moving to sit down. She started to cry. "You...he...hurt me. I don't know if I can forget that...."
"I love you Willow....you're my best friend....my only friend..." Angel said softly, "I don't know what happened....I'd never have hurt you...I'd die before hurting you...."
"It was the demon. You stupid asshole. You touched it. Giles said not to. Now look." Faith said angrily from the door. She surveyed the room, the impulse to just stake the bastard growing inside. She held the stake, her eyes blazing with anger as she looked at him.
Angel looked at her, his eyes filled with guilt and shame. "I lost her...whatever chance I may have had....she'll never see me again without remembered the attack. I've lost the only thing I had worth living for. Staking me would be merciful."
Faith gripped the stake tightly, getting her emotions under control. She knew in her heart that Angel would never have willingly hurt her friend, but that didn't change the fact that Willow had been hurt. "No...I won't do it. That's how the demon worked. Death for desire. He unleashed a part of you to try to bring about your death and hers. I won't let him win."
Angel watched her drop the stake, surprised at her actions. He watched as she moved to Willow, her face softening as she took in the bites and bruises covering her friend. "Take care of her."
Faith looked at him and nodded, "I will. I don't want you around her again...unless she asks for you."
"I won't hurt her....ever again" Angel said softly, taking one last look into Willow's green eyes.
She watched him, trying to forget the nights events. She looked at him and saw the smirk on his face as he had hit her. She saw the way he had smiled as he had fucked her. She tore her eyes away, her heart beating fast as the memories nipped at her mind. "Give me time, Angel."
Angel nodded slowly, knowing in his heart that he might not see her again. He knew that it was impossible to distinguish between himself and the demon that had taken him over. He had dealt with years of trying with Angelus.
She would never be able to forgive him. He just hoped that one day she might smile at him one more time. He knew it wasn't him, but he still felt the guilt. He should have stopped the demon. He should have done something. He left Willow in Faith's care, angry at himself for hurting the one thing he loved the most in the world.
**********
Willow looked at the others. They were all looking at her with pity and guilt, as though they were the ones who had hurt her. She didn't need their pity either. It had happened. She was dealing with it. Why couldn't they?
It had been three weeks since her rape. She hadn't seen Angel since that night. Surprisingly, Faith had been the one who had helped her the most. The brunette slayer watched her like a guard dog, but she had given her that needed kick in the pants, so to speak. Faith was the only one who didn't look at her in pity. For that, she would never forget the slayer.
"Has anyone seen Angel?" she asked softly, the thought of him now not making her grimace.
"No. The bastard is hiding out" Xander said, not caring what they said about it being a demon possession. He didn't believe it. He knew it had been Angel that had hurt his old friend.
"Xander" Cordelia said warningly. She had seen the flash of irritation enter the redhead's eyes. She hated to admit it, but she respected Willow. After being raped, the girl had proven to be the strongest person Cordy had ever known. She herself didn't think she could ever get over something that terrible. She could still remember what Willow had looked like the next day...the bruises and marks. Willow had overcome it though. She had moved on, accepting it as another Hellmouthy thing. "I saw him the other night...he was watching from outside." She said gently to Willow.
"Thank you" Willow said, glad to know he hadn't done something stupid. If she could forgive him for what his body had done, why couldn't he? She knew it wasn't him. She had read about the Kikirete a few days after the attack. She knew he had only gone after her because he loved her so much. In a disturbing way, it was rather nice to know someone loved her that much.
"How can you ask about him? After what he did?" Buffy asked, still hating having to see her friend in such pain. If it hadn't been for her, Willow would never have gotten into any of this mess.
"I love him" Willow said simply, standing.
"Red" Faith started to say something but changed her mind. She stood, her eyes looking into Willow's, "Are you sure?"
Willow nodded, "It's time to forgive and forget. The future can't wait indefinitely."
"I'm coming with you" Faith said, giving no room for argument. This attack had brought her and Willow closer together. Before it, they had been almost enemies, resenting each other and their place in the group. Now, Faith would honestly say that Willow was her best friend. She often stayed over at night, just watching over the redhead. Willow still had nightmares that woke her screaming, but she getting better. Faith had known it wouldn't be long before Red was going to see Angel again.
"I expected that, Mommy" Willow said, grinning slightly. The younger girl was often mothering her, looking after her. It was strange to have someone actually care again. She also knew that Faith still saw Angel. She could sense him on the girl when she returned from patrol. She knew he was keeping tabs on her and she admired that he wasn't forcing himself on her until she was ready. She did love him, despite everything that had happened.
"Be careful Willow" Buffy said, still not too happy that she had been replaced by Faith in Willow's life. But, she had been too close to everything to give Willow the help she needed. Angel had been the love of her life...it had been hard enough accepting that he had moved on much less having to accept that he had raped and beaten her best friend.
"I don't like this..." Xander said. He sighed, "But if he makes you happy, then what can I say? But, if he hurts you again...I'll have Faith and Buffy beat him up and stake him."
"Thanks for the thought" Willow said, almost laughing. "Come on Faith. We have a vampire to track down."
"She's something else" Giles said softly, watching the girl leave. Her bravery amazed him more each time he saw her.
"Yep. She's our Wills...wouldn't give her up for anything." Buffy said, hoping for her friend's sake that Angel was able to forgive himself as easily as she had.
**********
Willow was ok until they were about a block away from the mansion. Then, all hell broke loose. She kept seeing Angel in her mind, the way he had been that night. She began to walk more slowly, lost in her thoughts.
'I'm going to break you bitch...so bad that no one can put you back together again'
She froze, the words echoing in her mind. She saw Faith pause, the slayer looking at her curiously.
"You ok Red?"
"Fine" she said softly, attempting to smile. She continued walking.
'Your ass is mine. I own you, my little whore. Scream louder. It makes me hard'
"NO!" Willow said, holding her head. The voice wouldn't quit ridiculing her. She felt Faith come to her, the girls hands on her arms.
"Willow, what is it?" Faith asked.
"Leave me alone" Willow screamed, pushing Faith away. She couldn't rid her mind of Angel and the rape. The smirk on his face. The pleasure he got from hurting her...from making her scream. The words he taunted her with. He had been so cruel...so ruthless.
Faith watched as Willow fell to the ground, sobbing. She didn't know what to do. She had thought Willow was putting it past her, but it appeared that she wasn't succeeding. She felt her heart twist for the pain her friend had gone through...was still going through. She knelt beside Willow, pulling the crying girl into her embrace. Gently, she stroked her hair, "Shh, Willow. It's ok. You're safe. You're with me...I won't let anyone hurt you again."
Willow heard her friend's words and began to calm down. She felt so stupid. She had been acting for them all for so long she had begun to believe her own lies. She hadn't dealt with anything, blocking it out and trying to forget. She wasn't going to be able to forget. She cried for what she had lost that day, finally beginning to understand that things would never be the same no matter how hard she wished them to be.
There was no way she could see Angel. Not yet. She knew deep down it had never been him. He loved her. She had seen that in his eyes. But, she couldn't remember that look. Instead, she saw the look when he was possessed...when he had cared for nothing except causing her pain and trying to break her. She couldn't let the demon win. She was strong.
"Luv you Faith" Willow said softly, holding her friend tightly and crying more.
Faith just kissed the top of her head, wishing there was more she could do. If possible, she'd take the memories from her friend and relive them herself rather than have Willow go through the pain every time she tried to sleep. She felt pity for Angel, in a way. She knew that he loved Willow...had for a long time. But, now, she didn't see how Willow could ever hold him without thinking of the rape. She knew Willow loved Angel, that love the only reason the redhead was attempting to see him so soon after the rape.
"Luv you too Willow." Faith said softly, rocking the crying girl in her arms. She continued to stroke Willow's hair, whispering softly to her. She knew that it was time to take Willow home. She wasn't ready to face Angel yet. She settled down, knowing she wouldn't make Willow leave until her friend was ready. Besides, Willow needed this release. She had put off coping with everything in favor of putting up a brave face. Faith closed her eyes slightly, her cheek against Willow's hair, as Willow continued to sob softly, crying for everything that had happened the last few weeks.
**********
Faith let her eyes adjust to the darkness in the room. The soft glow of candlelight all that allowed her to make out the shadows. She knew he was there, watching her. She could sense him. She waited, knowing he would speak when he was ready.
"How...." Angel paused, steadying his voice, "How is she?"
Faith moved to sit down, making out the shape of the chair. She sighed, "Not good."
"Damn it" Angel cursed softly.
"She was getting better, or so I thought. Then, the nightmares came back. Worse than before. She can't quit reliving it" Faith said honestly, knowing her words were not what he wanted to hear.
"I'm so sorry" Angel whispered, closing his eyes.
"Not your fault" Faith said matter of factly. "Don't even try to argue with me. I've seen how you love her. You would never have done what that bastard did. That wasn't about love. That was pain, pure and simple."
Angel remained silent, knowing in his heart that it was his fault. Rupert had told him not to touch the demon. He had disregarded the warning, causing pain to the one person he loved. He was to blame as much if not more than the demon.
Faith rolled her eyes. She hated this. Hated feeling sympathy for someone that should be her enemy. But, she felt pity for Angel. The poor guy. His first love causes his evil self to return. Now, his second love had been raped by a demon wearing his body and face. She also hated seeing Willow in the condition she was in. It had been eight days since the redhead had tried to see Angel a second time. Again, she got a block away and the memories assaulted her. She had turned and run before Faith could stop her.
"She won't sleep....she hardly eats....she says she's fine, but I can see it. She isn't. She was better when she was in denial, but that was such a bad thing for her" Faith made a face as she ran a hand through her dark hair, "I don't know what else to do, Angel."
Angel snapped out of his guilty mood. "You can't give up. You're all she has right now, Faith."
"Damn it, Fang. I've tried. You think I like laying awake and hearing her cry herself to sleep every night? Hear her wake up screaming? Have to reassure her that I'll keep her safe? She shouldn't have to live like this!" Faith yelled, pissed off that he had left Willow completely alone. She knew he had in the beginning because of the circumstances. But, now, it had been two months. He should be trying to remind Willow that it hadn't been him. Not let her continue with the horrible memories. The only way she felt that Willow would get passed it all was if she was forced to get on with her life. And, in Faith's opinion, life was about making new memories to replace the bad.
"I know" Angel said softly, grimacing. He had ruined Willow's life. "Maybe I should just leave Sunnydale...give her room."
"Fuck this" Faith said, moving quickly. She reached for the lamp, turning it on. The light made Angel blink and she took a second to look at him. "Damn, you look like shit."
"Turn off the light please" he said slowly. He had taken to sitting in the dark, lost in the memories and thoughts of what he could have done differently.
"No" Faith said, crossing her arms. "You are acting like it was you that was hurt. I know emotionally you were. This is hell for you both. BUT, it's time to get off that dead ass and prove your love."
"I can't see her...she hates me" he said, blinking away a tear. He watched her at night, saw how thin she was getting. He hated it.
"No she doesn't. She hates the demon that hurt her." Faith stopped herself. "She needs you Angel. I can't do it alone anymore...we need you. Or she may never get over it."
"Damn it Faith" Angel roared, anger replacing self pity, "You make it sound like it was a cold or something. She was raped and beaten. And not only that, but the things he said...it's amazing she has been strong enough to make it like she has."
Faith looked at him, smiling slightly, "Duh. And yet here you sit, alone in the dark with your guilt. Is it a nice life Angel? Cause in my eyes, it isn't a life. You could turn to ash tomorrow and probably be better off than staying like this."
"Fuck you" he hissed, hating her more at that moment than he had ever hated anyone.
"Sorry, you aren't my type, but thanks for the offer." She grinned, "So, can I count on your help in getting Willow out of her depression?"
Angel glared at her, hating that she had gotten to him, "If I end up hurting more than helping, I won't do it."
She laughed, "If you hurt her again, I'll stake your tight ass myself. Don't worry about that babe."
His eyes took on a grudging respect. She really did care about Willow, a lot. He knew what she must be fighting to ask him for help, even if it was in her own unique style. She was a slayer asking a vampire to assist. Willow was lucky to have this one on her side. "Fine. I'll see her."
"Good" Faith nodded, moving away. "Oh, Fang?"
"What now?" he asked.
"You might want to take a shower. Looking kind of rank there." She laughed as she left the house.
Angel smiled slightly as the door shut. He hoped seeing him would help Willow. He didn't want to do anything to hurt her anymore than she had already been hurt.
Faith let out a deep breath as she leaned against the front door. Was she doing the right thing? Willow had been making progress again. What if this put her back in square one? She knew though that facing Angel would have to do something, even if it just made Willow realize that she could never be with him again. Then, they could know in their hearts that they had to move on. Right now, that would even be something. She just really hated being so helpless. She really did love Willow, and wanted nothing more than to help her friend find love with Angel. This had to work. She had to think positive. Hell, it couldn't hurt. She took off down the sidewalk, eager to find someone to fight.
**********
Willow looked around the park, taking in the kids playing basketball and the couples sitting peacefully. Looking at Faith, she smiled, "Ok. We're at the park. Why?"
Faith shrugged. She looked around but still didn't see Angel. Where was he? They had decided that him going to Willow's, back to the scene of the crime so to speak, wasn't wise. So, they had decided to have him stumble across them at the park. That way they could test Willow's reaction. "I just wanted to get out of the house. Besides, it's a gorgeous night."
Willow laid back on the blanket that Faith had set out. She looked at the stars, a slight breeze ruffling her hair. The slayer was right. It was a fantastic night. The sky was clear and they had come across no vampires yet. Just a nice peaceful evening together under the stars. "I'm glad you wanted to get out. I hadn't realized how stuff the house was getting."
Faith laughed as she handed Willow a coke. "It isn't stuffy. Just a bit overpowering sometimes. Heard from your parents yet?"
"Yeah....they aren't coming back for awhile. The conference was postponed and then Dad got a chance to teach at the University for the remainder of the term. They'll be back sometime this summer."
Faith kept her thoughts to herself. She had no regard for Willow's parents. They didn't even know their only daughter had been raped in her own living room. "So, Will. How are you doing?"
Willow sat up, balancing her head on her hand. "With what? With Angel? Well, we all know about the nightmares. I almost wish that I hadn't seen it. I know I can never forget what happened, but if I hadn't seen his face....I don't know. Maybe I'd be able to move on or something. As it is, I can't seperate the two of them in my mind. But I love him so much. That's what hurts the most...."
Faith sighed as she leaned over and brushed away one of Willow's tears. "It'll all work out Red. He loves you too. Together y'all can get through this. I know you can."
Willow shook her head sadly, "I used to agree with you...but now I'm not so sure. I can't forget the face, Faith. I've tried..."
"Damn it. I hate this! I hate seeing you in pain..." Faith stopped, suddenly aware she was about to say something that she shouldn't. She let out a breath, "We'll figure something out Willow. Trust me, k?"
"I do trust you Faith" Willow said softly. She had seen the brief flash of pain in her friend's eyes a moment ago. She wondered what the girl had been thinking about. "Too bad I can't just say a few words and go back in time or something."
Faith smiled at the girl's attempted humor. "Yeah, like in our time machine we were talking about. Or even a spell." Faith suddenly sat up. "A spell! Damn it. Why didn't we think of that....."
"Think of what?" Willow was getting confused. "A spell to go back in time?"
"No silly. Time travel is ridiculous. A spell to help you get over it....to get you back with Angel....to make you happy...."
"I doubt there is anything like that" Willow said quietly. She felt a flash of hope before it died down. "I don't remember hearing about anything that could help me through this."
Faith smiled, "You don't know it all, Red. We can ask Giles....or Angel even. He has tons of old books. It's worth a shot. I love you too much to see you so unhappy. We can start looking tomorrow."
Willow had to laugh, "Fine. We can look. But I doubt we find anything for this. Now, hand me some of those chips. I'm hungry."
Angel watched the girls from behind the tree. He had heard their words. His mind was running through every spell he had ever heard about. Faith might be on to something this time. He moved away, knowing it was not the time to reappear in Willow's life. She was happy for the moment. He'd go and start researching. He distantly remembered reading something about a substitution spell, but he couldn't remember the details. Maybe he could fix it all.
Faith's eyes caught Angel's back as he walked away. She sighed, hoping he had heard her idea. Maybe he would find something. She looked back at Willow, thankful to see a smile on the girl's face. Maybe soon this nightmare would be over. She felt a pang as she realized she would no longer be needed if Willow went to Angel. Oh well. At least Willow would finally be happy in the arms of the one she loved. Faith did want both of her new friends to be happy. She turned, watching the kids play ball as she and Willow continued to talk.
**********
Willow looked around the room, her eyes finding Faith. "Why are we here?"
Faith sighed, "Angel asked us to come. He said it was important. Are you ok?"
Willow nodded, taking a deep breath. She sat down on the couch, wondering why he wanted to see her. She also wondered if she was ready for this. It had been a few months since her rape, but she still found it difficult to think of him without getting scared. At least Faith was with her. She knew the slayer wouldn't let him harm her. "I'm fine."
"Yo, Fang! Where are you? A bit old to be playing hide and seek" Faith said, sitting next to Willow. She could see how scared and nervous her friend was. She sighed as she wondered what this was about.
"Never too old for games, Slayer" Angel said softly, stepping into the room. He avoided Willow's gaze, moving into the shadows quickly. It was best for her not to have to see his face while he explained what he had found.
"Angel" Willow said, thanking him for not moving close to her. She gripped Faith's hand, her fingernails digging into the slayer's flesh.
"Willow...I've missed you" Angel said, his words quiet but sincere.
"Me too" she said softly, knowing that she did miss her friend. She also missed the opportunity that she had lost with him.
"Why are we here?" Faith asked, wanting answers.
"I found a spell that might help" Angel said simply.
"What?" Willow looked in his direction surprised. "Did you ask him to?"
"I haven't spoken to him about it" Faith said. "What spell?"
"It's a substitution spell. It's very old and it may not work." Angel said, his words betraying his nervousness.
"What is a substitution spell?" Willow asked, eager for anything that might help rid her of this nightmare...that might let her be with him without the fear.
"Basically? It will allow a second, pleasurable sexual experience to replace the first painful one." Angel said.
"Good grief. There is actually a spell for that?" Faith asked, amazed. "There must be a spell for everything."
"It was created by a tribe during a war. Most of the women were raped brutally and the elder women created this spell. It was the only way the women would move on and marry. They had to give birth or the tribe would vanish. As I said, it may not even work. It was all I could find. It is documented rather well. The results then were favorable."
"What's the catch?" Willow asked, knowing it couldn't be that easy.
Angel sighed, "The act must be performed by one you love and trust. If there is any fear or pain, it will backfire and the nightmares will be worse than before."
"Sounds easy enough" Faith said, knowing that Willow loved and trusted Angel. "Do I get to recite the spell or something?"
Angel moved into the light, his dark eyes watching them sadly. He heard Willow's whimper at seeing him. He smiled softly, "She loves me, but she doesn't trust me. I can't be the one to rid her of this."
Faith scowled, glaring at him. "Then why tell us? Why get her hopes up and then let her down?"
"I said that I couldn't do it....there is another." Angel said, staring at Faith. He saw the girl freeze, her face flushing.
Willow looked between them, realization dawning on her. "One I love and trust...even as a friend...."
"No way" Faith said, shaking her head. "It would change things too much...I can't lose her, Angel."
Willow spoke up, "Please? It would mean no more nightmares.....I wouldn't be afraid of Angel anymore...I could be with him. Please Faith? I'm begging."
Faith looked at her, knowing she couldn't say no. Hadn't she said she'd do anything to help get them together? But why did that have to include making love to the one person she loved only to hand her over afterwards to Angel? She nodded, squeezing Willow's hand. "I'd do anything for you, Red. Besides, it would mean no more mopey vampire and a happy Willow. I'm in. When do we do this?"
Angel smiled softly, knowing how hard it must be for the slayer. Unlike Willow, he could easily see the feelings in the slayer's eyes as she looked at his Willow. Who was he joking? They were hers, not the other way around. "Tonight. I've got everything ready. Thank you Faith."
"Not a problem, Fang" she said simply. "Anything for Willow."
**********
Angel finished saying the words, his eyes on the two women in his bed. Willow was sleeping, her red hair spread out over the black of his sheets. He saw her pale breasts moving slightly as she breathed. Faith's arm was nestled around her waist possessively. The contrast of Willow's pale skin against Faith's tanned body was amazing. He counted to ten, willing his cock to soften.
It had been more difficult than he had ever imagined to watch Willow making love with the slayer. The act itself was beautiful. The two girls had very deep emotions existing between them that became glaringly obvious when they were in each other's arms. He had watched, aroused, as Willow had cum moaning Faith's name. Faith had been so sweet with her. Her patience and gentleness had surprised him. She seemed rather rough and loud most of the time.
What had been difficult was the realization that Willow was in love with Faith. She might not realize it yet herself, but he knew. He had watched them. It was something that couldn't be hidden. He knew she loved him...had only agreed to this in hopes of being with him. But, in the process, he had realized just how much she cared about Faith. Now, he was lost. He didn't know what to do anymore.
He loved Willow. He wanted her happy. Until that night he had assumed selfishly that her happiness depended on him. Now, he wasn't so sure. She had found everything she really needed in Faith. Love, friendship and lust. Besides that, Faith wouldn't hurt her. Not like he had. He watched their sleeping forms, admiring their beauty as he became more lost in thought.
Faith opened her eyes, smiling as she looked into Willow's sleeping face. She couldn't believe what had happened. She had forgotten about Angel as soon as Willow had looked at her. She couldn't believe she had experienced something so moving with another woman. Not only that, but in front of the woman's soul mate none the less. She sat up, her dark eyes finding Angel. He was watching them, lost in thought. Her heart went out to him.
Angel heard the sheets move and looked up into dark eyes. Faith was watching him, pity and respect on her face. He knew she didn't like him very much. His undead status and her slayer status pretty much meant they were enemies. But, they had one thing in common. He owed Faith more than she would ever know for getting Willow back to him. "You ok?"
Faith laughed softly, "I should be asking you that, shouldn't I?"
Angel smiled slightly, keeping his eyes on her face. She may be accustomed to nudity, but he wasn't. Not anymore. "I'm fine. The spell has been performed. I guess we'll know when she wakes up if she remembers the rape or not."
"What if it didn't work?" Faith asked.
Angel sighed, running a hand through his dark hair, "I'll leave her in peace. You can watch over her. She loves you, you know."
Faith beamed, "You think?"
Angel smiled ruefully, "I know. I saw it in the way she touched you...the way she watched you. She used to watch me that way."
"She still loves you" Faith said, bring her knees up under her chin. "She cries out for you at night all the time. I always felt a bit jealous....the way she would say your name....She definitely loves you."
"You think?" Angel said, smiling at her.
She laughed as she shook her head slowly. "You're impossible."
Angel saw Willow stirring, her arm moving as she began to wake up. She yawned, sitting up and looking at them. She smiled at Faith tenderly, before moving her eyes to Angel. Angel asked softly, "Are you ok?"
Willow nodded, "I'm fabulous. I think it worked. No nightmares. I can remember it but it's like something that happened when I was a child....a distant memory that I've gotten over...Does that make sense?"
Angel smiled, "It worked. That's what the book said would happen....."
Willow leaned back, pulling the sheet to cover her breasts. She looked at Faith again and then back at Angel. She had come to understand that she loved them both. She was in love with Angel and now, thanks to the spell, they had a future together. But, she also cared very deeply for Faith. She was confused. "So, what now?"
**********
Willow poured herself a glass of orange juice and sat down at the table. Her body was sore, but in a good way. She smiled as she thought about the last few months in her life. So many things had happened these last few months. She was finally getting a full nights sleep. No nightmares at all. The spell had worked perfectly. She had moved in with Angel a few days after it had been cast, her love for him even more strong than before.
"Here you are" Angel said, walking into the kitchen.
Willow smiled, her pulse racing at his nude form. "You found me."
Angel moved to sit beside her, his hand taking hers. "I woke up without you...Didn't like that very much."
"Quit pouting" she said, laughing softly as he drew her into his arms and onto his lap. His cock twitched against her leg, making her smile. "I got thirsty."
Angel nuzzled her neck, his hands caressing her breasts. "Thirsty? Is that all? Well, I guess I may have buy one of those small refridgerators to put by the bed. Can't have you wandering around at night..."
"Obsessed much?" she asked softly, moving her head to the side to allow him better access to her neck.
"With you, Red? Fuck yes" he said, nipping her skin. He could smell her growing arousal as he moved his hand lower.
"Could you two keep it down?" Faith asked, walking into the room. She laughed as they looked up like two guilty teenagers. She sat down on the table, taking the glass and draining it. "Don't you two get enough ever?"
"Have a lot of time to make up for, Slayer" Angel said, smiling. His fingers slid into Willow, causing her to gasp.
Faith laughed as she straddled his leg, her hands joining his on Willow. "Well, then. Don't let me stop you."
"Guys...can we move this to our bedroom?" Willow asked, her breathing erratic as they both entered her with their fingers. Faith kissed her, catching her words.
Angel kissed his way down her neck, his mouth covering her back with kisses as Faith kissed her. His leg was soaked from her and Faith's juices. He let his other hand find Faith's wet slit, his fingers roughly entering her. She cried out around Willow's mouth, riding his hand as she pumped her hand into Willow. Soon, both girls screamed out their climax as his hands were soaked with their cum.
"Did you say something about moving into the bedroom?" Faith asked, her eyes getting a wicked gleam.
"Poor Angel....all hard and no release....think we can fix him up?" Willow asked, her hand stroking his length.
"Between the two of us, I'm sure we can come up with something" Faith said, her chuckle sending shivers of desire through Willow.
"Well, then. Let's go unleash some of this passion" Willow said, standing. She looked at Angel, "Coming, lover?"
"Always with you, Red." Angel said, standing and following the laughing girls into their bedroom. He knew then that they wouldn't be getting very much sleep that night. Oh well, things could always be worse. That he knew. Smiling, he dived onto the bed, taking Willow into his arms. He kissed her softly, whispering his love before he entered her.
Willow, Faith and him. A strange relationship, he knew. The three of them living together had shocked the gang, but they were slowly being accepted. The love between the girls was obvious to anyone. HIs love for Willow could not be questioned. He was even growing more fond of the slayer as time passed. They did everything together. He personally wouldn't have it any other way. Willow was smiling and laughing and happy. He was happy. His life was great.
THE END
Unleashed
Story Notes:
The rape is performed while Angel is possessed by a demon.